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Wednesday, 30 June 2010

A Blueprint For Modern Noise

More photos!
(all courtesy of D.Cotterell)
Swarming up Pavlis' Hill

El Diablo escaping the beer-throwing hordes

Riders came down an icreasing muddy off-camber descent only to have to hurdle a pile of branches and run up the hill back into the range of the 'spectators'

It was harder to run the bike up the hill than it looked.

Shouldering the bike was key!

Monday, 28 June 2010

Whenever I Breathe Out, You're Breathing In.

Sunday 26th June saw the first race of the Dirty Deeds Urban Cyclocross Series. Held at Harrison Street Velodrome, the course wound its way through the infield, took riders up on to the track, and eventually broke free into the surrounding areas. Organizers were up early to hammer in stakes and hang up bunting, but seemed to spend more time writing their names in the mud.

An impressive crowd turned up when they were alerted to the presence of a vegan bake sale and free coffee, but stuck around when they noticed a bike race was about to break out. A number of them brought with them noisemakers - particularly cowbells, which was rad - but fortunately no bongos.

The no-restriction bike category was up first. Consisting mostly of mountain bikers, these folks did an excellent job of carving up the course for the CX category, as well as providing some excellent racing. Here's someone representing the Ukraine re-enacting his escape from his co-operatively owned potato soviet.

Someone on the internet had been telling everyone they were going to ride their fixie. I eventually sent the guy an email, saying that unless they had mad skillz, they shouldn't do it. When that guy turned out to be Matt Gray, I figured my fears were unfounded.

Or maybe not.

Apparently he had tried to fit knobbly tyres on his bike, but they didn't fit. So instead of riding a more appropriate bike, he simply cut some of the knobs off the tyres. It's genius like this that earns you a prize for 'inappropri-bike'.

Jess Morgan represented Brunswick Cycling Club by rolling around in the Unrestricted Category. I had a bit of a roll on her bike the day before, and was mildly disturbed to find the brakes did not work at all. Afterwards she told me that it was fine, because she never had to use the brakes anyway.

I had also spoken to Dylan during the week preceding the race. "I'm going to ride my '86 Diamondback," he told me, "It's going to be sick." I voiced my concern, telling him he'd have to ride in the Open class. "Oh, I won't just ride against the mountain bikers," he replied, "I'll smash them." This he did not do.

Despite receiving an occasional helping hand. Also, his seatpost did not start the day like that. It was bent in an attempt to bunnyhop one of the barriers. If his seatpost was bent, I'm not sure what happened to his... you know... bits...

After the Unrestricted Category, folks milled around waiting for the main event to begin.

Pavlis' hill seemed to be a favourite vantage point. The irony of naming a particularly boozy section of the crowd after a straight edger was not lost on anyone. From there you could see the course inside the track

And the run up outside of it. You could also occasionally spray your friends with beer, as the Gif files below prove.

The world's coolest corporate lawyer was out in force, representing both his profession and his nation. There were a number of skinsuits on display, which was both disturbing and kinda cool.

I'd never been around this part of the track before, and was surprised to find it was a swamp. I'm sure a number of cyclists felt the same way. Sam McGregor, pictured above, suggested that this race was the hardest he'd ever done. Perhaps next time he won't do it on his touring bike.

The eventual winner of the CX category, Nic "Spiro" Edwards, prancing over the carpark barrier like a freaking gazelle. He turned up wearing those tattoo-sleeve armwarmers, until I offered five dollars to anyone who could remove them from him. Perhaps in the interest of not being pulled off his bike by a ravenous crowd, he removed them himself. I still haven't paid him.

Mud Porn.

Campbell Townsend called me up on Saturday night. "I've just done a six-hour in Albury. How long is the race tomorrow going to be?" When informed it was only 40 minutes plus one lap, he seemed quite relieved.

Dirty Bike Porn.

Unrestricted Category winners, L to R:

2. Matt Gray
1. Lewis Rattray
3. Dyon Balding

1st Girl was Jess Morgan, pictured here fulfilling barrel girl duties. Seriously, she never stops giving to the club.

CX category winners, L to R:

2. Sam Beck
1. Nic "Spiro" Edwards
3. Leigh Deluca

While his position on the podium made me better understand Leigh's keeness to sponsor this event, I was still impressed at his efforts, given he had broken his collarbone on the Hell Ride a mere 8 weeks previous. Apparently he was due to see the surgeon the day after, to assess whether or not he was fit to start riding again.

The next generation of CX riders.

Thanks again to the sponsors (click on the links to the right!), the organizers, the helpers, the spectators, the noisemakers, the prizepresenters, the foodeaters, the coffeedrinkers, the beersprayers, the racers and the club.

I forgot to write that none of the photos are used with permission, but were taken by the following folks:


See you again on the 25th of July!

Lost In What We lack

If you lost a PRO multi tool on Sunday please let one of the organisers know (let us know what colour it was).

We would be happy to return it to its owner.

More photos to come...

Sunday, 27 June 2010

You Know What I Want.

Some more of the early mail, from the world's coolest corporate lawyer and a guy who would've ridden if he hadn't been ogling architecture porn all day.

More pics and reports as they arrive.

Like An Adventure Playground For Adults.

NOTE: Riders marked as on the same lap are in no specific order
Dirty Deeds CX Round 1
Sunday 27th June 2010                  

Open Class                     
40 Min + 1 Lap                 
Place   Rider   Laps    Finish order
1.      Lewis Rattray   8       1
2.      Matthew Gray    8       2
3.      Dyon Balding    8       3
4.      Donatas Bludzis 8       4
R. Shepherd     8       
John Griffiths  8       
John Wright     8       
Cam Woolcock    7       
Chris Arnold    7       
Tim Marquardt   7       
Nic McEnroy     7       
Ian McGinley    7       
Aron Hemmingway 7       
Ben Vlass       7       
Ben English     7       
Josh Mc         7       
DamoH           7       
Liam Hood       7       
S. Gow          7       
D. Shackleford  6       
Michael Azoury  6       
Ollie Wigg      6       
Mick Efford     6       
1.      Jessica Morgan  5       
2.      Libby Evans     5       
Joe Hallahan    5       
P. Warner       4       
David Masterson 6       dnf

Cross Class                    
40 Min + 1 Lap                 
Place   Rider   Laps    Finish order
1.      Nic Edwards     9       1
2.      Sam Beck        9       2
3.      Leigh Deluca    9       3
4.      Adam Trewin     9       4
J. Soawer       9       
Daniel Nelms    9       
Sam McGregor    9       
Dean McLellan   9       
Nik Cee         9       
The Blakey      9       
Karl Pavey      9       
J. Kent         8       
Benzy           8       
James Maebus    8       
Rubin Royter    8       
Max Provera     8       
Matthew Barron   8       
Andrew Scotty   8       
John Shadbolt   8       
Steve Duggan    8       
Stu Weir        8       
Andrew Spencer  8       
Mike Claytor    8       
Jason Flaherty  8       
Matt Ladner     7       
Mark Holloway   7       
She Dunget      7       
B. Wejendorp    7       
Andre Cerny     7       
Pete Curtis     7       
P. Greenwood    8       dnf
Cyclic          9       dnf
A. McDonald     9       dnf
Brad Clark      7       dnf
Andrew Luedecke 7       dnf
C. Townsend     7       dnf
Damian Auton    6       dnf
Chris Black     5       dnf
Andre Cerny     4       dnf
Tristan         4       dnf
Justin Matthews 2       dnf

Into You Like A Train

So Round One went down today in what was excellent conditions... the ground was wet, the mud deep and sticky, the weather co-operative and the spectators loud and vibrant...

The full results will be posted after the drug tests have been completed (caffiene levels below a certain threshold indicate a failure to enjoy coffee supreme products sufficiently and may result in disqualification).

credit: D.Cotterell

Here are some of the shots from the day that are emerging:

The CX podium - L-R: Sam Beck, Nic Edwards, Leigh DeLuca


Matt 'Aero' Gray - riding cutdown knobbies on his street fixed.

Pavlis' Hill (aka log pile barrier to hill of suffer) - the site of more beer handups and heckling than anywhere.

Reuben 'This is my second day on this bike and first day with spds' Ruiter

Campbell 'I won a 6hr MTB enduro yesterday so i'm a little tired' Townend - with one of the best colour-co-ordinated kits of the day (as always).

Shouldering the bike was the key to a fast run-up

Stu 'Kiwi' Weir - smiling through the pain

Stu doing EnZed proud

Benzy dodging beer spray from the 'Hillsiders'

Met this guy @ Warby and would happily trade $ for his SF CX team's kit.

That guy...

It's funny how many smiling shots you see... when everyone agrees how much hurt you are in mid-race

El Diablo - maker of fine fake sausage rolls, engineer-whiz, all-round good guy and part-time member of the blue man group.

The apron of the velodrome was a good place to shift up a gear (if you had them) and push the pedals with a lot less resistance than the very soggy grass and mud and maybe begin to wonder why you were out there.

Sam 'Muttonchops' MacGregor made the barriers look like little steps.

The infield at the end of the day - coffee, baked good and the sign-up for 40mins of hell/fun.

2nd place getter and studley park runner/cross rider Sam Beck shows off his ribbon collecting methods.

Thanks to SRAM for their supply of ribbon... and thanks to whoever for the weather - dry day and muddy ground!

Benzy may have lost to Heavy Metal James, but he won most beer-soaked rider award.
photos credit:J.Dougrey